ok. now its the starting of a new mth. which so far i've my fair share of gds and bads. well, on 1st this mth, i had a bday dinner with my parents and andy (my dad's bday) at mirama hotel, ikoi restaurant. den we had a long chat there. a 2 nearing 3 hrs chat. and den my dad actually tell andy this. if there's a chance ask me to bring him over to my relatives place on chinese new year to pay a visit and see how big my family is. i was like stunned at that sentence lo.haha. i mean to me if my dad means this coming cny. i think its abit too fast le. i'm not even prepared for that. imagine my dad was like wow. in the past he never ever mention that to any of my ex. not even to my bro's stable EX-gf. he actually mention it to andy. omg... i cant believe it. its like so amazing and stressful to me. wat happens if one day we were to break up? wat will my dad say? how will he feel? i'm now in a dilemma. if were to really break up. will sure cos even more problem to me n my life will definitely go out of order. i think will be worst den any of my previous relationship. anyway den on sat nite after clubbin, when we(andy n me) go back we had a nice chat. den i started to realise that when we juz got into a relationship he's not even serious at all. its till ltr den he started to get serious. i was like so stunned. so this is the kind of image that i gav him. i almost wanted to kill him. haha... but that nite i did feel that he care for me n was damn protective over me when we are at momo. its like everytime we club he wont keep hangin onto me. or kiss me. but on that nite, he kept hanging onto me, and actually hug me, kiss me and even hold my hands in front of his friends when we were at the cafe. which i was quite stun. den he was kissing n huggin me throughout the whole nite. haha.i like that kind of feelin. feel so protected and so loving. den while chattin he started to say that he feel that he kind of starting to love me. n that he feelin is sth indescrible. well. i can understnad that. cos to me he doesnt belong into the list of guys that i wanted. those that belongs in the office wear type, with at least a degree, and is english speaking. he's totally of the opp. he's like only an o level grad, doesnt speak english and damn vulgar. den i'm also not his type. his type of gers are those small in size, big boobs, fair skin, pretty pretty face wan. wherelse i'm dark skin, small boobs, big in size, etc... haha. so we dun belong to each others category of partners but yet we manage to end up with one another.
mayb juz so coincidentally we match this saying, 'opposite attracts' and 'usually we will end up with a partner that doesnt match ur ideal partner at all'. hopefully this applies to us forever ba. den hopefully we can stick together. damn tired of changin partners le. well. i duno if he's serious. but i kwn i'm. if one day he tells me that he was juz playing. den i'll juz end it ba. i think i'm kind of immune to hurts le. but still i'll definitely feel hurt wan lo.hai. dun wan to think soo much. will make me feel more insecure only. let me juz stay with watever i've can le. i dun wan to feel lose, cos if i do i'll make things more difficult for myself n everyone ard. so i think juz stop thinkin n indulge myself in this wondonful moment ba. |
